Knocked Up..the movie...not me

Being infertile has really changed my perspective on life. When I was in high school I wasn't sexually active for a whole host of reasons. Mainly because if something happened I knew I wasn't prepared to take care of a baby. In fact I was in favor of abortions because I didn't think teenagers should be raising babies because let's face it they aren't generally well equipped to do so.

Even as a young adult I had a few pregnancy scares due to missing periods. Well, we know now that it was PCOS rearing its ugly head and being pregnant couldn't be farther from the truth. But even then I was still worried about being able to raise a child or having to raise a child with the father. If I remember correctly in one situation I was going to have an abortion if it turned out I was pregnant.

Fast forward some more years and if I knew then that I was going to be infertile now I probably would have started having babies in high school. Okay, that would be over exaggeration. But thinking back on the situation I wonder how I would have felt if I had gotten pregnant and had an abortion. What if I never got pregnant again? How would I have felt? I am very lucky to never have that regret.

But it does bring up a pretty important value/belief. Where do I stand on abortions now? Well, let's look at the "evidence". Exhibit A: popular tv shows such as Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant etc.. Exhibit B: popular movies such as Knocked Up and Juno. Exhibit C: My close friends. When I add everything together I think my perspective has changed some.

The biggest change is that abortion certainly isn't for me. Even if I wasn't infertile I don't think I could end a pregnancy unless their was a serious medical concern or it was my 11th child. But chances are if I was worried about more than 5 children I would be preventing pregnancy instead. MOST IMPORTANTLY I still believe everyone should have the right to chose for themselves and that right shouldn't be taken away.

In other fun realizations, I am starting to get that baby obsession feeling again. Where it basically plagues my entire existence and I feel like high five-ing pregnant women in the face with a chair. I guess I just feel like I am going no where. I have an appointment in 21 days to be exact to official start IUI. It's just that hurry up and wait feeling like when we were waiting for the police checks. I wonder if visiting Baby Gap will help? I guessing not but I am sure Pottery Barn Kids would help.

Now for the cuteness that is making my heart melt...

(via Pinterest)

This is also the cutest baby. I really hope I get lucky and have a cute little girl like this one day. I always said to my hubby that I want our babies to have his blue eyes. The accent is pretty cute too (most days).

(via Pinterest)